Monday, December 06, 2010

If I were a rich man

Sooo,
you know how sometimes I link my old posts?
I've decided to go one better and just repost a whole one. It's really long and a pal who was looking through my archive single it out for a compliment so I thought I'd share it again (and update the song and phone referenced).
Here it is, from October of 2007, a really freaking long meme...

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Jocelyn did a Jedi mind trick on me and made me do this. It took DAYS to finish so I think it only fair to give you days to read it. I'll be back next week. Feel free to pace yourself.


If I were a beginning, I would be…. "It was a dark and stormy night..." Name that book?


If I were a month, I would be…September, while learning is still something to be excited about and the fall colors are showing. It's not cold but a cozy polar fleece is perfect.

If I were a time of day, I would be… 11:11 Auspicious but in a useless way.

If I were a planet, I would be…orbiting Sirius. Don’t want to get toooo close though.


If I were a season, I would be…..Fall, bring some shorts, sandals, a warm jacket and an umbrella, who knows what you are going get!

If I were a sea animal, I would be….salty, wanna lick?

If I were a direction, I would be….west.

If I were a piece of furniture, I would be….a cozy chair; versatile and comfortable.


If I were a sin, I would be…mortal, you do know what you are getting yourself into, right?

If I were a liquid, I would be…mercury, because liquid metal is awesome and gallium just doesn't sound as cool.


If I were a scare, I would be…the one that haunts your nightmares and gives you a chill down your spine. Ever danced with the devil in the pale moon light?

If I were a gem, I would be…semi-precious.

If I were a flower/plant, I would be…some sort of scrubby little flowering shrub.

If I were a kind of weather, I would be….capricious.

If I were a musical instrument, I would be…a cello.

If I were an animal, I would be…wild.

If I were an emotion, I would be….swinging.

If I were a vegetable, I would be…delicious.

If I were a sound, I would be…water, sometimes soothing, sometimes overpowering.

If I were an element, I would be…plutonium. Can’t touch this!

If I were a car, I would be…a hybrid; a little of this, and a little of that.

If I were a song, I would be... catchy but hard to understand in spots.


If I were a food, I would be...Thai; salty, sweet, spicy, sour and sometimes bitter, but always in balance.

If I were a place, I would be…a magnetic pole, prone to wandering.

If I were a material, I would be…plaid silk.

If I were a taste, I would be…fleeting but worth repeating.

If I were a scent, I would be…floating in the air.

If I were a religion, I would be…misunderstood and misused.

If I were a sentence, I would be…compound (with plenty of parenthetical phrases thrown in for good measure).

If I were a facial expression, I would be…transparent.

If I were a subject in school, I would be…self paced.

If I were a colour, I would be...vibrant.

If I were a thing, I would be…a noun.

If I were a book, I would be…library bound.

If I were an artist, I would be…messy.

If I were a collection of poems, I would be…eclectic, an anthology type of deal.

If I were a landmass, I would be…Europe, separate but attached.
If I were a watch, I would be…superfluous. Who needs a watch?

If I were God, I would be…a goddess.

If I were a vowel, I would be...rounded.

If I were a consonant, I would be…an alveolar trill, or a sibilant s.

If I were a theory, I would be…more than mere hypothesis.

If I were a famous person, I would be…mocked for my fashion choices.

If I were an item of electronic equipment, I would be…a Droid.


 If I were a sport, I would be…a contact sport.

If I were a movie, I would be…a comedy.
If I were a cartoon, I would be…the Animaniacs.

If I were an explorer, I would be…intrepid, it only seems suitable.

If I were a scientist, I would be…mad.

If I were a relation, I would be…tenuous.

If I were a river, I would be…relentless.

If I were intoxication, I would be…all-consuming, enslaving, freeing, euphoric gratification. I am the new drug.

If I were alone, I would be…relaxing.

If I were a question, I would be…leading.

If I were a habit, I would be…addictive.

If I were in an atom, I would be… possessed of charm or maybe topness.

If I were you, I would be…tired of reading this.

14 comments:

lime said...

an alveolar trill....fabulous. and i see we both have sibilant tendencies.

faboo...always fun, always a wee bit edgy, always logo

Grundir the Implacable said...

Ah, the treacly stench of a meme!

G said...

I know what that phrase signifies, "...the rain fell in torrents". I won't give the book name because I can't recall it right now. Let someone else take a crack.

Excellente!

somewhere joe said...

I always thought of you as an amaryllis, but that's me...

The number 11:11 followed me around for a number of years, on clocks, addresses, randomly and auspiciously. But now seems to have tired of the game.

snowelf said...

This is just jolly good fun!! I love reading these!

have a great week!

--snow

S said...

Your visually impaired pal thanks you for the enlarged and bold font!

Interesting very interesting and hey, I dont find you at all like plutonium....

Gillian @ Indigo Blue said...

1:11 is my time. Wow, what's with the ones? We are being programmed by the overmachine.
You are so creative Lo. Your answers are the absolute best. Says so much about you that I had already guessed.
Xo
Blue

Ann(ie) said...

I am impressed. Did you drink while doing this?? I would have had to!!

snavy said...

I'm impressed.

lol - I was going to mention how proud Susie must be by your use of visuals!!

TLP said...

This was most excellent! I did NOT tire of reading it. Not at all. One of the best meme's I've ever seen.

cathy said...

Paul Clifford.

If I were a cheese I'd be crumbly.

Don't ask me why I said that, it's 5am and insomnia is a bitch.

Seamus said...

Wonderful MEME - well done!!!

hmmm, if I were a car I'd be a Ferrari - sleek, cranky and forever in the shop!

actonbell said...

That's great, Logo! It's addictive. And I'm loving that orange chair...

weirsdo said...

Thoroughly enjoyable. Glad you reposted.
Happy Holidays.