Sunday, December 31, 2006
2. I resolve to ride my motorcycle as much as possible and read a bunch of books.
3. I resolve to enjoy life, not sweat the petty things, and not pet the sweaty things.
Hope you have a great evening tonight and a truly fabulous New Year that brings more laughter than tears and events that will bring delight when remembered.
If that is aiming too high, well, here's to hoping it won't suck.
Friday, December 29, 2006
While I have been known to call from the store to ask, "Why did I come here again?" I am a reasonable intelligent and self-sufficient human being.
Due to his previous career in the military I have in fact maintained our household in his absence for up to six months at a time, all by myself! It is true that I lack his attention to every fricking minute detail of life but that is ok. If you had two people who were that uptight in one house the resultant tension could rip a hole in the time/space continuum, and then where would you be, or when for that matter?
Now see, I can remember completely useless trivia. The immediate usefulness of any information evidently dicates how my brain processes and stores it.
"Spouse's cell phone-toss it, it's crap!"
"Cultures responsible for Cuniform, Linear B, and Hieroglyphs- queue for critical retention."
I swear I don't do it on purpose! I have other little foibles as well.
I've tried to convince him it's all just part of my charm. The extent to which he is charmed seems inversely proportional to the amount of aggravation said tendencies are currently causing.
Anyway, we are working on year 17 of this marriage, so clearly we are successfully negotiating all this so far.
The reason I even bring it up is because I got an email asking me to do a couple errands and this was at the end of the mail...
PRINT THIS PAGE PRINT THIS PAGE PRINT THIS PAGE PRINT THIS PAGE PRINT THIS PAGE PRINT THIS PAGE PRINT THIS PAGE PRINT THIS PAGE
O.K., drive careful and I'll see you when I get home. Love ya lots.
In BOLD, underlined, red text he informed me he thought I would benefit from carrying the list with me.
Isn't that sweet?
Thursday, December 28, 2006
It's fun for the whole family! The kids get to practice their math and the grown ups get to bet.
I whomped my brother in law by shutting the box when we had both bet our whole stack of chips. I had been down to one chip at one point then came back with a vengence and KICKED ASS!
Not that I am competitive or anything, it's all just good clean fun, especially when I win :D
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
Monday, December 25, 2006
Oh em gee! That is a nice hunk of cow, mmmmm.
The roads were mostly empty so our trip to see the family on Whidbey Island was quick and painless.
Such good food, and I whooped @$$ at a new game we received.
The neice and nephew quite enjoyed their Walter the Farting Dog book and stuffed animal.
Now I am tired and must get to sleep.
Sunday, December 24, 2006
Saturday, December 23, 2006
The thumb wrestling championships were after dinner and then the good bit...
"I got alot of problems with you people, and now you're gonna hear about it!"
Ah, the holidays, a time of peace and love and all like that stuff there.
Tomorrow, 7 seafood dinner for Christmas Eve! Yummmm
Given that we celebrate Festivus, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and Boxing Day I find myself rather busy.
Heifer project total...$600!!
If you want to contribute you have until the 25th to follow the link over there >>
Hope you had a happy Festivus!
Thursday, December 21, 2006
Gift bags whenever possible (I believe in energy conservation) but they don't work so well with something, and some PEOPLE, gift lookers!!
2. Real tree or artificial?
REAL! Must be real, always! You hear me, Mr. Logo?? ALWAYS!
3. When do you put up the tree?
As soon as I can talk Mr. Logo into it Usually around the 15th
4. When do you take the tree down?
After New Year's or Epiphany
5. Do you like eggnog?
Eggnog is lovely, especially with Capn Morgan
6. Favorite gift received as a child?
A Barbie dream house from my gramma, ooooooo, Barbie was stylin'
7. Do you have a nativity scene?
Yup, if you lived in Naples and don't have Il Precepe of some kind I think you get a fine or something, at least a very stern lecture from an Italian grandmother, be afraid
8. Hardest person to buy for?
I dunno, I figure if you can't decide what exactly someone would want you get them food. Everyone likes food, and now its so easy to get people gift cards, there is no such thing as hard to buy for anymore!
9. Easiest person to buy for?
The kids, they are very clear on what they want and therefore I am very clear on what they want
10. Mail or email Christmas cards?
Mail, and late
11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received?
A sweater with huge embroidered flowers and sequins. Kill me now, my step-mother-in-law must have thought I would wear it
12. Favorite Christmas Movie?
Charlie Brown or Christmas Story, oh, or the Muppets Christmas Carol, or...
13. When do you start shopping for Christmas?
When I can no longer ignore Mr. Logo's urging to get the present buying taken care of
14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?
15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?
My sister's cheesecake, mmmmmm
16. Clear lights or colored on the tree?
I prefer clear, Mr. Logo prefers colored, we have colored lights on the tree but NO ICESICLES!!
This far and no further, dang it!
17. Favorite Christmas song?
Stop the Cavalry by Jona Lewie
18. Travel at Christmas or stay home?
At home for part, and with local family for part
19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer?
Probably not, am I allowed to Google?
20. Angel on the tree top or a star?
Star, with lights in it
21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?
One on Christmas Eve, the rest on Christmas morning
22. Most annoying thing about this time of year?
23. Favorite ornament theme or color?
Penguins, I love my penguin ornaments. Ive been sort of collecting them for years but I keep it quiet because I don't want a bunch of stupid, ugly penguins given to me which I would then be forced to use
24. Favorite for Christmas dinner?
We all love the appetizers and the desserts, so we focus on those Christmas day. The 7 Seafood dinner on Christmas Eve is always a big hit. Although this year the esteemed elder sister is making a standing roast, ooooooo
25. Leave cookies & milk for Santa?
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
I think the time bandits have been raiding my stash.
I'm going to be gone till tomorrow night.
If you start missing me too much feel free to dig through the archives till you find a pic and then talk to it.
Just don't do anything creepy, or if you do, don't tell me about it.
Tonight I'm gonna party like it's 1999.
Is that still passe, or is it long enough for it to be retro?
Monday, December 18, 2006
and in fact, none at all for a majority of my life,
I have a confession to make.
Late at night, when the mood was right,
when I was all alone,
I would sometimes watch The Tick.
The sayings of The Tick amuses me even still.
"The night is young and we have umbrellas in our drinks."
"Yes, destiny has her hand on my back, and she's pushing."
"Eating kittens is just plain... plain wrong! And no-one should do it, ever!"
"And so, may Evil beware and may Good dress warmly and eat plenty of fresh vegetables."
"Gravity is a harsh mistress."
"Well, folks, there you have it. A day in the life of a superhero and his sidekick. It's a very long day, the tights are uncomfortable; I think we covered that before. Map light, convenient and essential. A lot of working of villain motifs. Crime has a Bossa Nova beat. Leap before you look. Remember denouement. Other French words: inconvenient, nonessential... oh... I could go on and on... But time's a-wasting and evil's out there making hand-crafted mischief for the swap meet of villainy. And you can't strike a good deal with evil. No matter how much you haggle. We don't need to look for a bargain; goodness is cheap because it's free, and free is as cheap as it gets. Cut. What was that pig about?"
Friday, December 15, 2006
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
It's estimated Newgrange was built about 3200 BC. Ancient humans in Ireland built this enormous thing and aligned it perfectly to sun's course in the sky. An amazing feat accomplished without surveyors, retractable measuring tapes, compasses, telescopes or building code inspectors.
We will not be building anything, but I will let the Things stay up all night, the idea being to watch the sunrise after the longest night of the year. We will oooo and aaah over the astronomical wonders included in our "Round the Sun in 365 Days adventure cruise (no expenses included, void where prohibited, cruise length is indefinite, see participating dealers for details)."
In other news,
we have $200 toward out Heifer Project donation!
Monday, December 11, 2006
Sunday, December 10, 2006
the shiny lil doo-dad and a close out of the velvet burn out fabric, and.. OMG!! Did you see that?? I have CLEAVAGE!
The girls are quite happy in their booster seats and I guess since I will look ok and be comfortable I can survive a Christmas party, besides, it's going to be at the aquarium, that could be cool, right?
Thursday, December 07, 2006
Is it not cute?
Is it not precious?
Oh, and on my ride I determined something. My bike is definitely a girl.
I'm thinking we may have to go with Red Molly.
Jury's still out on the name though.
That's for you, Dan, I know how you love the movie links.
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
Ariella here, and dang it, they are at it again. If it weren't bad enough they bogart the couch, the blog, the bed and the chocolate they also deny me the call of the wild. So fine, they want to feed the birds, ok, too much Mary Poppins in the formative years would be my diagnosis, but whatever. However, they could have the decently to let me chase away the non-avian interlopers who insist on invading my yard and stealing the food they put out for the birds!
The filthy little theives actually ripped open and stole the entire suet block on this other post but am I allowed to chase them away? Tear their nasty tiny tails from their sneaky little bodies? Ooooh nooo, because they are" sooooo cute!"
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
This year he also coached Little League, took his older son to Montana on his motorcycle, changed careers, and bought me a new motorcycle.
Here's to hoping it's an even better year that coming!
Monday, December 04, 2006
Saturday, December 02, 2006
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Sunday, November 26, 2006
I answered the phone and heard a deep voice with a vaguely English accent saying,
"You're a maaaaaaarshmallow."
It was Thing One calling from the extension.
This may seem an odd term of endearment, and odd behavior, to some of you, but that just means it fits in around here.
A couple years ago I was sitting with a friend when Thing Two came running to me,
"Mom, he stole my love penny!"
My friend looked very puzzled, "Love penny??"
This required a historical background.
When Thing One was very small and would ask for money I would usually give him a penny,
"Alright, here, you can have this just because I love you."
Occasionally he would give me a penny for the same reason.
These came to be called love pennies. Nowadays, what with inflation and all, I occasionally get love nickels.
The theft of any money is a heinous crime, but to take a child's love penny seems especially egregious.
I actually have a love nickel sitting beside my computer monitor right now.
It's very reassuring, I am loved AND if I have a desperate need for a gumball, I am set.
Love can be shown all kinds of ways, and gloves are one of the best.
I hate having cold hands.
I've generally pretty warm blooded. I run around in a sweater when friends are in coats and I am just fine.
But I hate it when my hands are cold.
I don't care if I have doors held open for me.
I don't even notice if I end up walking on the traffic side of the sidewalk,
but gloves, now that will capture my little heart.
I received an absolutely fabulous pair of gloves from Mr. Logo when we were living in Italy.
They were picked right out of my pocket on a bus in Rome.
That was very upsetting to me.
But I digress.
The other thing I wanted to mention is...
on Friday I received something that made me feel quite loved.
Thursday, November 23, 2006
Due to little incident where I walked out in front of a moving car quite some years ago my knees are hardly in good shape to start with and these sorts of shenanigans do not help. Weeks of babying the joint had paid off and it was feeling much better.
Today, courtesy of a turkey grease spill, I managed to pull a similar maneuver in my kitchen with a freshly made latte in a mug from Italy. The mug survived the fall without so much as a bump. Half the coffee unfortunately ended up splattered all over the walls, the window, the ceiling, the fridge, the counters, and on me. The other half stayed in the mug and was delicious.
I did not fare as well, though it was nothing that being waited on and medication couldn't handle.
Happy T day to you!
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Sunday, November 19, 2006
The following is a man's explanation of why he thinks the "Women are complex, men are simple" thing is completely off base.
Men are extremely complex. The area we are most complex is in the interaction with women. This is because we:
1. Know what we what,
2. We know you know what we want,
3. We also know it is much better than sweet corn (this is an in-joke).
We have usually built up a fairly decent amount of data as to how women will react to certain things. At any time where a response on our part is expected we immediately plug the possible responses into our data matrix and calculate how that will affect the probability of us getting what we want. Then we also calculate how that response will affect the woman's expectations in the future and the resulting effort on our part it will take to meet those expectations. At this point we have to take into account our willingness to extend that effort and the ability to change to the point we can meet those expectations.
So now we have a three variable polynomial. However you must realize that this is derived from empirical data and is not an absolute formula. Therefore the situation could be looked at as just another experiment to gather data which will be used for future decisions.
There are, of course, other terms that we must take into consideration. We know that timing and the immediate past are very important to the calculation. An improper response can destroy all the effort we had put in previous to this moment.
I'm still at a loss to explain this fact, but then I'm not a woman.
Now I could go on, but explicating the rest of the variables would be tedious and they are of less importance, and frankly men often discard them in the interest of time. We know that we have to reply after it seems we have considered the issue (which I think I have proved that we do, just not the way women might think) but before the point a woman gets annoyed and thinks that the man has been ignoring her.
This is an amazing feat of number crunching even disregarding the data collection that has gone on in the past. Only after this analysis do we give the response which we think maximizes the probability and at the same time minimizes our effort.
So I think that you can't say that men are simple by any stretch of the imagination. It just surprises me given the tremendous effort that goes into each response we give that we are so often wrong.
Note: all people who are sticklers for mathematical rigor should not read further.
First the formula then the explanation.
P(Sigma Epsilon Chi) = 1 - [(A/X) + (B/X^2) + (C/X^3) + ... + (N/X^n)]
While not specifically statedin the original description arose what men are really calculating is a probability.
Therefore we have the standard probability formula of the form P=1-Y. The choice of Sigma Epsilon Chi as what we are calculating the probability of should be obvious. There are limits placed on this formula. As the probability of anything cannot be more than one or less than zero (given standard definitions) therefore the variable term must be bounded by one and zero. This leads to the limitation of X, which is the actual variable in the equation, to be greater or equal to one. The terms A, B, C, up to N are constants. All the constants are in fact derived from previous encounters. These have a fair degree of stability.I have defined A as the inverse probability of Sigma Epsilon Chi for a certain response determined in the past. In other words there is a probability of Sigma Epsilon Chi for "yes dear", "I love you", and "get back in the kitchen and make me some pie". The greater the probability for Sigma Epsilon Chi given a particular response must be subtracted from one to arrive at A. Therefore a response with a large probability would decrease the A/X term and maximize the probability for Sigma Epsilon Chi if all other terms are held constant.The B term is defined as the delta of future expectations. While at first glance this would seem to have nothing to do with the probability of Sigma Epsilon Chi it actually does influence it. Men know that women always want to raise the bar even if they are continually disappointed with their effectiveness at doing so. So if a given response would seem to raise the bar for future romantic efforts it increases the probability of Sigma Epsilon Chi. Men want to hold this bar down (see explanation of the C term) so they strive to minimize the delta. Ideally the delta would be zero but the perceived delta would be very large.The C term is the total willingness and capacity to meet those future expectations when the bar is raised. In an ideal world for men they wouldn't have to do anything to achieve a probability of one for Sigma Epsilon Chi. Since this is obviously not the case effort must be expended. Men also know that they cannot over-promise for the future in order to receive Sigma Epsilon Chi unless there is no plan to be involved with the current controller of Sigma Epsilon Chi. Which I must point out is a very bad practice because it throws off the calculations of every subsequent man involved in the future with said controller.Now there are obviously N constants associated with this calculation. Since it would be tedious to catalog them all I am going to dispense with that exposition. However we are still left with the most important term in the calculation. That is X. X is an unknown. That is because it cannot be determined with certainty until after the response has been given. X is of course the woman's inclination to Sigma Epsilon Chi at a given time. This would obviously be completely unknown to the man. Men must project what this X will be for a given response. While some X's are fairly certain (the use of the B word is almost certain to drive X to near one) the higher values are very difficult to arrive at. The higher values are the ones which give the greatest probability of Sigma Epsilon Chi.At the end though the whole probability devolves to 0.5 because as we all know either it happens or it doesn't.
P.S. Here is the medical scoop, many thanks for all your prayers and well wishes.
My auntie had surgery and it seems to have gone really well.
She may not even require chemo!
We'll know more when the test results are returned in a couple days.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
I'm a little busy and stressed out lately,
and my blogging is suffering.
It's not that I don't love you all,
because clearly I do.
To sum up,
Mr. Logo has just accepted a new job, yay!
My mom's breast cancer has re-occurred, pisser.
My aunt was diagnoses the same day with the same thing,
same breast even, sisterly solidarity I guess.
We are hosting Thanksgiving here.
I have school stuff to do,
and this and that,
and I can't find my overdue library book.
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Friday, November 10, 2006
It is the perfect treat for fall days.
Here is a little visitor who came to see us recently.It reminded me of Still Life With Woodpecker.
In other news,
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
We have been notified regarding the delay in your receipt of honorarium for your most recent lost tooth. Please accept our apologies. Recent disruptions in service are largely attributable to technology upgrades, new demands to cope with heightened national security as well as increased household security measures which are increasingly common, and changes in how transactions are handled.
The vigilance with which all air traffic is now monitored, and the stern, even extreme measures taken these days were a key factor in causing the Tooth Fairy Consortium Strike (one tooth fairy gets a wing shot off and they all get mighty huffy, let me tell you). Successful negotiations were not reached (I’m sorry, but with the tooth exchange rate at an all time low and health care costs being what they are we simply cannot afford two dwarf body guards for each fairy, its just not feasible!!) and so I would like to inform you that your services are now being provided by a new vendor. Some of our clients are being serviced by pixies and in remote areas gnomes are sub-contracting to provide all our little boys and girls the kind of quality service that has been expected for generations.
The delay in processing your case has highlighted some critical errors in the system which were promptly addressed and the computer programmer and the gnome responsible were sacked (we had to rehire them straight away as we are very short-handed but believe me, they were really scared there for a minute, the gnome even started to cry and promised to do better, of course the computer programmer was blubbering right from the beginning, but that’s to be expected).
In addition to your tooth honorarium we are enclosing a gift, a fairy kiss, please apply topically to your forehead which should serve to give you a brief sense of being affectionately regarded and should prevent chicken pox for at least 24 hours.
Thank you for your continued business,
The Fairy Queen (Tooth Division, Seattle Branch)
Monday, November 06, 2006
Anyway, here is some music the Things are enjoying lately, and begging to watch over and over and over and over and over and over and over...
Do you see what I live with??
Do you see???
Saturday, November 04, 2006
this horror and tragedy will never happen on my watch.
Oh the humanity...
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
or generally make a fool of himself for the entertainment of others.
He clearly would never behave in any way that might be considered less than completely dignified.
Monday, October 30, 2006
Who am I to argue with what works?
And one last item before I stop rambling.
In addition to their contributions in the arts, sciences, and ethnic jokes
the Polish should also be recognized for their pottery.
I found this at a kitchen shop and couldn't decide if it would work with my little set below.
How cute would that tea pot be with these, eh?
Good thing I don't collect tea pots, innit?
Alright, I'm done.
Oh, for those who were interested, I transcribed the text of my magnetic poetry
Flash Fiction 55 into the comment of the post below.