Thursday, August 31, 2006

Some mighty fine swine

I have had pig on the brain alot lately,
what with one thing and another.
But this is the latest,
The Pig That Wants to be Eaten.
A review...
"Douglas Adams posed many a philosophical question in his works. For some, the most hilarious - or disturbing, was the meal that introduced itself and recommended certain portions for consumption. In a society fully detached from the processing of living flesh into oven-ready tidbits, Adams portrayal of "the pig that wants to be eaten" seems outlandish. Yet, is there truly a moral issue in developing a food that not only embraces the opportunity to be consumed, but has the capacity to help the diner choose the more desireable cut?
Julian Baggini poses this and ninety-nine other questions in this tantalising collection. Many of the topics he raises have been with us for millennia - remaining unresolved today. The author draws the old questions to centre stage, clad in modern finery and make-up. The new appearance helps bring the reader into the questions with a greater sense of comfort, one hopes. But when the last line has been read, it's clear that this isn't just an entertaining recasting of old conundrums, but of serious issues we confront daily.
Reading them all in one go could be dangerous to your mental health!"
It's a fun and thought provoking book, and one best enjoyed a bit at a time.

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Trivia Tuesday

Last week, The Idiot won at 80 and Neva, Minka and Joel tied at 70, good show!
This week, I am wimping out.
Feel free to hit a quiz from any Tuesday in the archive or
Here...
Take your chances at Sports Trivia
or
Take a timed 10 question trivia Quiz
or
See how you do with some American History Trivia
or
play with WORDS.
Hope you all find something trivial enough to suit you there.

Now, if you feel brave, stick around for lesson from the life of Logo™

I am from beautiful Whidbey Island in the Puget Sound.
Only those smiled upon by the gods can claim Washington as their place of origin
and to be from Whidbey Island?
That clearly denotes a special measure of favor.

Its either 36 or 62 miles long, depending on where you measure, that makes it either the longest,

second longest,

or third longest island in the lower 48.

We island folk are comfortable with the ambiguity though,

so it's OK.

Today I took my motorcycle on the ferry from Everett, WA across to

Clinton, from there I rode to my parent's home in Oak Harbor.

I miss the twisty little backroad the highway on the island used to be.

These days it is straighten and flattened, has wide shoulders and groomed greenbelts.

I remember when being able to drive that road at fifty miles per hour spoke of familiarity and a decent ability to negotiate a slithering roadway

(outside-inside-outside, people, and accelerate through curves).

Sigh, progress, you know how it is. Anyway...

Below is a local landmark of Oak Harbor, the windmill.

A monument to the early founders of the town, many of whom were Dutch. Inventive lot of folks those Dutch,

they named the harbor after the trees,

and the town after the harbor.

And now, Whidbey Island trivia, YAY!

1. Whidbey Island's State Routes 525/20 is the only nationally designated Scenic Byway on an island.

2.Historic Coupeville is the third oldest incorporated town in Washington State.

3. Gray whales migrate between Whidbey and Camano Islands during March and April of each year.

4. Whidbey is the home of Penn Cove Mussels, harvested off the coast of Coupeville.

5. Whidbey Island and Camano Island comprises Island County.

Coupeville, on Whidbey, is the County Seat of Government. However,

Whidbey Island and Camano Island have no direct route of transportation.

One must pass through two other counties, providing quite a conundrum for vital county-wide services.

Clever, eh?

Saturday, August 26, 2006

The MOTHER OF ALL MEMEs

Because I have so much free time lately (HA!) I thought I would answer the most enormous MEME ever passed around through blogland.

So here they are, far more than anyone wanted to know,
the answers to 63 questions no one asked me...

1. How old do you wish you were?
This old is fine for now
2. Where were you when 9/11 happened?
Naples, Italy, it was a scary time to be an American living abroad.
3. What do you do when vending machines steal your money?
Tip them over on myself, that'll learn 'em!
4. Do you consider yourself kind?
Yes, a veritable model of kindness. Self-delusion is an important life skill to possess
5. If you had to get a tattoo, where and what would it be?
Had to??
Well, if you told me I had to I definitely wouldn't want one at all.
6. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?
I'm sort of working on Spanish, hola
At various times I've been semi-fluent in Greek, Italian and ASL
7. Do you know your neighbors?
Not in the biblical sense, but in a neighborly way, yes, I do.
8. What do you consider a vacation?
The variations are wide, but lots of free time is a constant
9. Do you follow your horoscope?
Nah, I can barely keep track of our family's planning calendar.
10. Would you move for the person you loved?
Yup, and have done, across the bed and across oceans.
11. Are you touchy feely?
Yup
12. Do you believe that opposites attract?
If we are talking magnets, sure
13. Dream job?
Superhero but with a pay check, and set hours,
and a good medical/dental package and a nice retirement.
Is that asking so much?
14. Favorite channels?
History Channel, Discover Channel, Comedy Channel, none of which I get right now. Waaaaah
15. Favorite place to go on a weekend?
Out and about in a boat, or a motorcycle, as the case may be.
16. Showers or bath?
Shower if I must, but I vastly prefer baths
17. Do you paint your nails?
Yes, well, hardly ever on my fingers, but my toes are usually done.
This is evidently a girly meme, I am guess the guys wouldn't have alot of variation on that answer.
18. Do you trust people easily?
Usually, despite how bad an idea that occasionally ends up being.
Turns out I am not as good a judge of character as I had once thought.
19. What are your phobias?
I have no phobias, only completely rational fears
20. Do you want kids?
Are you offering me more or offering to take the ones I have?
21. Do you keep a handwritten journal?
Not usually, but occasionally there are things that require expression in paper and ink.
22. Where would you rather be right now?
Wrapped up in comfortable delusions
23. What makes you feel warm and safe?
Moderate temperates and no imminent danger
24. Heavy or light sleep?
I sleep like the dead, but my children are wired straight to my brain somehow,
I can sleep through just about anything else.
25. Are you paranoid?
Only when they are out to get me
26. Are you impatient?
Is this bloody thing over yet???
I am very patient with animals and children,
less so with adults,
uncooperative inanimate objects, stupidity and selfishness annoy me excessively.
27. Who can you relate to?
Almost anyone if I try hard enough, but I am very thankful for the ones I don't have to try with.
28. How do you feel about interracial couples?
What?? I feel fine, what kind of question is THAT?!
29. Have you been burned by love?
No, love has only ever eviserated me
30. What's your life motto?
Semper ubi sub ubi
I don't live by it, but it amuses me.
31. What's your main ringtone on your mobile?
A little calyspo type thing
32. What were you doing at midnight last night?
Taking a bath and reading
33. Who was your last text message from?
Some blankety-blank daily horoscope a friend sign my phone up for, grrrrrrr.
I was being charged for them so I had all text messages blocked.
34. Whose bed did you sleep in last night?
Mine
35. What color shirt are you wearing?
Black
36. Most recent movie you watched?
Calendar Girls
37. Name five things you have on you at all times?
Wow, at ALL times, that's tough, uh...
skin, hair, freckles, bacteria, tooth enamel.
When I go out into the world-
cell phone, diver's license, house key, debit card, shoes
38. What color are your bed sheets?
Green stripes
39. How much cash do you have on you right now?
$4, we are mostly debit card people.
40. What is your favorite part of the chicken?
The bottom
41. What is your favorite town/city?
Rome and Venice are lovely,
and Athens and Dublin and London are great too,
New York is amazing and LA is mind boggling,
but I really do like Seattle best of all.
42. I can't wait till...
UPS delivers my package.
43. Who got you to join Blogger?
BSoholic, Snavy, and Thomcat
44. What did you have for dinner last night?
Grilled Teriyaki chicken, with rice and veggies, Mr. Logo is amazing
45. How tall are you barefoot?
5 feet 5 inches, and don't call me Barefoot.
46. Have you ever smoked crack?
No, who WROTE this?
47. Do you own a gun?
No, why? Are you going to come rob my house?
In that case, yes, several, and a bat too, and some knives, and a really wicked temper.
48. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
First beverage of the day is tea, black and properly steeped or don't bother, with milk and sugar.
Barring that possibility, coffee, anyway I can get it.
49. What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
Being me
"You're no exception to the the rule, I'm irresistable, you fool, give in!"
(5 bonus points if you name that musical)
50. Do you have A.D.D?
That question might be open to interpretation, I mean, the symptom list for adult ADD is highly subjective and varies from source to source, speaking of which, does a high level of subjectivity move a subject from being a science and make it more of an art? Oh, and while we are talking about art, Lime had a great piece of art on her blog the other day. Do you like huckleberries?
51. What time did you wake up today?
8:00 a.m.
52. Current worry?
Whether it is that there is peanut butter on my chocolate, or chocolate on my peanut butter?
53. Current hate?
When the sun shines right in your eyes
54. Favorite place to be?
Just left of here
55. Where would you like to travel?
I'd prefer to stick to countries free of plague, revolution and filth, what does that leave...Canada?
56. Where do you think you'll be in 10 years?
I hope I will still be in Washington state, and oh sweet fancy Moses, I will have a 20 year old.
57. Last thing you ate?
crepes (roll that 'r')
58. What songs do you sing in the shower?
Gregorian Chants a la Monty Python, but without the head bashing
59. Last person that made you laugh?
Thing Two
60. Worst injury you ever had?
Damage sustained walking in front of a car, look both ways, dammit!
61. Does someone have a crush on you?
Nah
62. What is your favorite candy?
Reese's cups, Almond Roca,
Jolly Ranchers, jelly beans or
Sixlets when I am looking to regress
63. Favorite errogenous zone?
Mine or his? and isn't that a rather personal question?
Cheeky monkey!

Thursday, August 24, 2006

I'm BUSY!


I'm out,
leave me a lovely little message.
Be back later!

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

It's Tuesday!

First, well done, Idiot! He aced the quiz.
Miz B was hot on his heels with a 90,
and Pavel, Joel and Jenna tied at 80.
Impressive!
Next I have a little visual aid on how to tell if your man can pick up on subtle nuances in communication.

And then we have,
Try not to google, kids,
and remember, EVERYONE'S a winner,
except the whiners, that's just annoying.

Monday, August 21, 2006

On two separate occasions

in the last week I have been called a liberal.

I dig it the most.

Friday, August 18, 2006

Well, its Friday

...and in the manner of energy efficient bloggers the wide world over I am falling back on a tried and true formula. That's right folks, its time for 55 Flash Fiction. And since I am from Washington, I am especially good at conservation, so I am not even going to write any new ones. I realized when I was doing some file sorting that I have written forty different 55 word flash fiction pieces. Some of the first ones I wrote were never even posted on this blog, they were only ever comments over at Susie's.
So, I decided to post a little review.
Hope you find something that doesn't repel you.

This is the first one I wrote.
In a balmy ocean breeze languid fingers entwine, matching new rings shining brightly. Smiles exchange, tender and private.Passion flares, and suddenly the sparsely peopled beach seems crowded. Belongings are gathered and stowed as the young lovers hurry to answer the call of love. A lone old woman watches with a smile, remembering joy.
-----
I wrote this 55 for Lime when she suggest
Screaming Yellow Zonkers as a topic.
She was thinking of the candy
but being difficult, as I am wont to do,
I did a different take on it.
Leaning forward she reached up with her right hand, fingers seeking a hold. No, still too slick, she re-chalked and tried again. There was an ideal crevice for a fist jam just overhead. The Screaming Yellow Zonker was graded 5.11, but she knew she could do it. After all, she survived holidays with her mother-in-law!
------
This one was inspired by real life events.
Late at night, fingers stroke, caressing a forbidden love. Silence is so important, critical. If heard, if he discovers them together like this, at this hour, he will be so annoyed. She smiled, enjoying the stolen moments. Then she froze as she heard, "Will you please turn off that bloody computer and come to bed!"
------
I wrote this 55 at Monika's request, and about her.
I rather liked it and because of her busy vacation schedule I'm not sure she ever saw it.
Definitely due for a reposting.
A woman of many languages and lands sat down and waved her hands over the magical tool that would bring familiar faces she'd never met right to her room. She would converse with people she could not hear and explore worlds without form. As long as Minka had the internet, who needed a crystal ball?
-----
This last one is not by any stretch the best one, but I like the story.
Mr. Ratburn accused me of writing a girly 55, so I challenged him to a 55 duel.
We wrote at the same time and I finished first with puctuation and grammar in place
and as you see below, the topic was NOT girly.
He awarded me an A for my efforts.
The midday sun beat down on his bent head but his concentration never wavered. Drops of sweat beaded and rolled down his forehead, stinging his eyes. He swiped them away and continued. The sun glinted off the carefully angled magnifying glass clenched tightly in his fist. Those stupid ants didn't stand a chance against him
There you have it, the 55 retrospective.
Have a good weekend.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Wednesday's child is full of woe.

While I was not born on a Wednesday, I am feeling sympathetic.
(I was born on a Thursday, and for those of you keeping track, yes, I STLL have far to go).
Yesterday, Thing One (that is the older one)
and I went to visit my family.
It was an hour long ride and about halfway through I stopped at a fabulous little place where they make to die for sandwiches and an incredibly good cup of espresso.
The guy asked me if I trusted him and when I grudgingly assented he made me a Cuban.
That was a new way to drink a shot for me,
and it was delicious.
My favorite bar in Italy used to put the sugar into the cup before they pulled the shot,
and stir it in half way through, so you had nice undisturbed crema on top and it was lovely.
Then Thing One lost a glove, 20 minutes later we were on the road.
He got to play with his cousin who is heading back to the east coast later this week.
The picked blackberries and got to go to the store by themselves.
All was going well until it was time to go.
THEN
Thing One attempted inadvertantly to poison himself.
He wanted some ice tea.

His auntie and I told him it was in the kitchen.

He went to get some and the next thing I hear is retching sounds,

Turns out he had poured himself a nice glass of....

Yes, Pine sol.

Mmmmmmmm

My mother went into full-on panicking dither mode

so we sent her home (across the street) to check her closet for ipecac.

He was already puking, it was a blatant attempt to keep her out of trouble.

We called poison control and they said the puking was good,

give him milk when he's ready to keep something down

and expect a sore throat for a while, he's fine.

Much relieved we changed him shirt, washed his face

and got him some milk.

Then my mom came over,

still panicking

and gave us the number to poison control.

We explained it was done, all was well.

She insisted on calling them because SHE had been talking with someone

there who wanted to know what he had ingested.

So while she was reviewing the events on the phone...

an ambulance pulled up.

My mother had called an ambulance too.

Now, for perspective...

this is the woman who told me (when I was a child)

"If it isn't bleeding or broken, I don't want to hear about it."

As a small child I ingested bleach...twice.

But, this is her grandson,

and panic seemed the appropriate response I guess.

He was fine within 30 minutes,

sucking on peppermints and observing,

"I haven't gotten this much attention since I broke my arm."

Here it is, more proof that although some men get tall,
they don't ever grow up.
Are you suprised?
(this is no one I know personally)
Onto less prickly issues,
Miz B won the quiz with a 90 last week,
Minka and Neva tied at 80,
lovely job, ladies!!
Yes, I have made the arbitrary distinction that this is a female quiz,
can you blame me?

Monday, August 14, 2006

Sometimes, when I've been watching

lots of Oingo Boingo videos and reading too much Bloom County.
I kinda miss the 80s.
Billy and the Boingers (the artists formerly known as Deathtongue) speak to me.
Alright, enough sentimentality.
Click the link in the post below if you haven't yet,
and if you have questions for the quiz tomorrow you better email 'em quick.
Send the question with four possible answers and the correct one marked to
Have yourself the best blankety-blank Monday you could ever dream possible.
I need some more caffeine I think.

Saturday, August 12, 2006

A link

Ladies, go watch this.
Men, move on, move along, nothing to see here.

Friday, August 11, 2006

It has been brought to my attention...

that if one intends to leave a post languishing for days one should not give it such an obviously dated title, such as"Hump Day" for example. This is one of the great things about having friends watching out for you, they pass on these helpful little bits of data.


So I thought I would share something new with you.
This is the fountain I just made for my mother.
I know you can't really tell from the picture, but it's quite lovely,
no, really, it is.
I have decided, now that I have made two little tabletop fountains that are not completely hideous and worked pretty well that I want to make one for my living room that would go on the wall.
Turns out this is a somewhat more complex procedure.
'Course, I could always just buy something suggestive of Italian style,
even if I think it is somewhat...ICK.
Or there is the more artistic approach,
something I clearly can't replicate on my own.
Or I could go with the multicultural approach.
Or maybe I should just get something funky or fun,
even if it doesn't "go" with the room.
And they are all so reasonably priced, no?
Back to the drawingboard.

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Happy Hump Day!!

I can, and have, been accused of a wide variety of faults.
But, I have great taste in friends.
Today a package arrived from one of my friends, Lime.


Two books I've been wanting and some tea, from China.
I couldn't want to try some,
so I pulled out my little Chinese tea pot.


But there were two different teas,
and I wanted to try them side by side.
So...
at the risk of being somewhat irreverent in matters of tea and culture,
I brought out my little Japanese teapot too.
To tell you the truth. I actually prefer the Japanese pot. It has a filter.
But shhhh, we won't discuss that while Chinese tea is being served.
So I read ridiculously funny books to my kids while we drank some lovely tea,
all courtesy of one of the bestest friends a gal could have!
Thanks, babe!

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Last week Neva and Pavel got 90 on the quiz!
Guggs, G and Miz B all got 80,
good job, peoples!
Oh, for the days when chubby redheads were in fashion.

And finally,
Have fun!

Monday, August 07, 2006

Good Morning to you all!

The weekend, in addition to some exceptionally entertaining yard work,
we also had a local geek come and do some emergency work on our 'puter.
I fear for my little friend.
If any harm befalls it
we may have a Romeo and Juliet type scene,
I'm just warning you all now.
Also, Thing One and I went on a ride to the beach pictured above.
The water was so still, it was amazingly tranquil, pacific even,
ha ha ha.
Taking a motorcycle ride with one of the kids is a great way to spend time together.
Much as I adore them, and I do, I am frequently downright amazed at the non-stop stream of noise that issues from their mouths.
The two of them talk almost constantly.
I don't want to constantly be hushing them though,
I know it is only a matter of a few years and I will be probably be begging them to speak with me.
So I try to behave right now
as I hope they will when that day comes.
Motorcycle rides are the perfect solution.
We are together, they can make as much noise as they want,
and I can't hear it.
Mr. Logo once offered to buy helmet intercoms and shouted down that idea so fast his head was spinning.
Today Thing One was leaning against my back and I could feel he was singing.
It was absolutely perfect;
we were doing something together that we both love,
we were enjoying it each in our own way,
and the sun was shining but it wasn't too hot.
When we arrived at the beach we had a long chat about all manner of things.
All in all, it was a pretty good weekend.
**JUST A LITTLE REMINDER**
It is the last day to vote for my caption,
and yes, you can vote multiple times.
I hope you'll take a moment and

Friday, August 04, 2006

55 flash fiction?

Surrounded, I watched for my opportunity to escape.
I quietly slid the door open and slipped out into the last moments of dying light.
No people, no demands, only orange blue gold haze almost too gorgeous to be real.
I breathed the cooling air and felt the fading warm rays of the sun.
Serenity now.

Thursday, August 03, 2006

I've always known I had a gift,
too bad I can't exchange it.
Oh well, at least I'm not the only one.


and now, to go with that story,
a lil tune from the Violent Femmes.
~~~~~
I don't know what you're doin' here
I don't even want you near
Seem like a seem like a
I'm a I'm a
I'm a freak magnet
I'm a freak magnet
I'm a freak magnet
I'm a freak magnet
And I'm callin' all the freaks
From the freak freak planet
I'm a freak magnet.
~~~~
I can't IMAGINE why!








* Honorable mention to Joel who mentioned this affliction in his last post.
*Many thanks to Crystal, who brought the article to my attention.

**AND DON'T FORGET TO VOTE FOR LOGO!!**

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

OOOH
OOOOH
OOOOOOOH
Me! Pick me, pick me!!
Right here, really, pick me!!

(caption contest in the right sidebar)

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Tuesday Trivia

CONGRATULATIONS TO LAST WEEK'S WINNERS!
Vera and Lime tied at 80
and Weirsdo and Neva tied at 80,
good job!
*Update* This is a Monk fish, as featured at the flying fish market in Pike Place, picture taken last Thursday.