Two notes:

The days are getting longer which makes me happy.
Also, polite cherries (cordial) are really rather vile, and handing them to unsuspecting people who are expecting a nice truffle is rather unkind.

Thank you,
that is all.

If I were a rich man

Sooo,
you know how sometimes I link my old posts?
I've decided to go one better and just repost a whole one. It's really long and a pal who was looking through my archive single it out for a compliment so I thought I'd share it again (and update the song and phone referenced).
Here it is, from October of 2007, a really freaking long meme...

----
Jocelyn did a Jedi mind trick on me and made me do this. It took DAYS to finish so I think it only fair to give you days to read it. I'll be back next week. Feel free to pace yourself.


If I were a beginning, I would be…. "It was a dark and stormy night..." Name that book?

If I were a month, I would be…September, while learning is still something to be excited about and the fall colors are showing. It's not cold but a cozy polar fleece is perfect.

If I were a time of day, I would be… 11:11 Auspicious but in a useless way.

If I were a planet, I would be…orbiting Sirius. Don’t want to get toooo close though.

If I were a season, I would be…..Fall, bring some shorts, sandals, a warm jacket and an umbrella, who knows what you are going get!

If I were a sea animal, I would be….salty, wanna lick?

If I were a direction, I would be….west.

If I were a piece of furniture, I would be….a cozy chair; versatile and comfortable.

If I were a sin, I would be…mortal, you do know what you are getting yourself into, right?

If I were a liquid, I would be…mercury, because liquid metal is awesome and gallium just doesn't sound as cool.

If I were a scare, I would be…the one that haunts your nightmares and gives you a chill down your spine. Ever danced with the devil in the pale moon light?

If I were a gem, I would be…semi-precious.

If I were a flower/plant, I would be…some sort of scrubby little flowering shrub.

If I were a kind of weather, I would be….capricious.

If I were a musical instrument, I would be…a cello.

If I were an animal, I would be…wild.

If I were an emotion, I would be….swinging.

If I were a vegetable, I would be…delicious.

If I were a sound, I would be…water, sometimes soothing, sometimes overpowering.

If I were an element, I would be…plutonium. Can’t touch this!

If I were a car, I would be…a hybrid; a little of this, and a little of that.

If I were a song, I would be... catchy but hard to understand in spots.

If I were a food, I would be...Thai; salty, sweet, spicy, sour and sometimes bitter, but always in balance.

If I were a place, I would be…a magnetic pole, prone to wandering.

If I were a material, I would be…plaid silk.

If I were a taste, I would be…fleeting but worth repeating.

If I were a scent, I would be…floating in the air.

If I were a religion, I would be…misunderstood and misused.

If I were a sentence, I would be…compound (with plenty of parenthetical phrases thrown in for good measure).

If I were a facial expression, I would be…transparent.

If I were a subject in school, I would be…self paced.

If I were a colour, I would be...vibrant.

If I were a thing, I would be…a noun.

If I were a book, I would be…library bound.

If I were an artist, I would be…messy.

If I were a collection of poems, I would be…eclectic, an anthology type of deal.

If I were a landmass, I would be…Europe, separate but attached.

If I were a watch, I would be…superfluous. Who needs a watch?

If I were God, I would be…a goddess.

If I were a vowel, I would be...rounded.

If I were a consonant, I would be…an alveolar trill, or a sibilant s.

If I were a theory, I would be…more than mere hypothesis.

If I were a famous person, I would be…mocked for my fashion choices.

If I were an item of electronic equipment, I would be…a Droid.

 If I were a sport, I would be…a contact sport.

If I were a movie, I would be…a comedy.

If I were a cartoon, I would be…the Animaniacs.

If I were an explorer, I would be…intrepid, it only seems suitable.

If I were a scientist, I would be…mad.

If I were a relation, I would be…tenuous.

If I were a river, I would be…relentless.

If I were intoxication, I would be…all-consuming, enslaving, freeing, euphoric gratification. I am the new drug.

If I were alone, I would be…relaxing.

If I were a question, I would be…leading.

If I were a habit, I would be…addictive.

If I were in an atom, I would be… possessed of charm or maybe topness.

If I were you, I would be…tired of reading this.

"I thought of love with its head ripped off still trying to sing..."

the hookers, the madmen and the doomed


by Charles Bukowski



today at the track

2 or 3 days after

the death of the

jock

came this voice

over the speaker

asking us all to stand

and observe

a few moments

of silence. well,

that's a tired

formula and

I don't like it

but I do like

silence. so we

all stood: the

hookers and the

madmen and the

doomed. I was

set to be dis-

pleased but then

I looked up at the

TV screen

and there

standing silently

in the paddock

waiting to mount

up

stood the other jocks

along with

the officials and

the trainers:

quiet and thinking

of death and the

one gone,

they stood

in a semi-circle

the brave little

men in boots and

silks,

the legions of death

appeared and

vanished, the sun

blinked once

I thought of love

with its head ripped

off

still trying to

sing and

then the announcer

said, thank you

and we all went on about

our business.



"the hookers, the madmen and the doomed" by Charles Bukowski, from What Matters Most is How Well You Work Through the Fire.
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I know I've mentioned The Writer's Almanac before it must be linked again because
Since the 1st, when this was the poem of the day, the phrase I used as a title has been dancing around in my head. Sometimes a poem or song phrase will stick in my head... for YEARS!
Like this line in Lovers in a Dangerous Time,
"...gotta kick at the darkness til it bleeds daylight."

It just speaks to me.