Sunday, May 31, 2009

to infinity and beyond...

One family of four dressed for an average day:

4 pairs of underwear,
4 pairs of socks,
3 t-shirts and one bra,
4 shirts,
4 pairs of pants,
2-4 polar fleece overshirts

= 26 pieces of laundry

x 7 days in a week = 182 items of laundry in clothing alone
then add in

4 bath towels, various hand towels and washclothes,
3 sets of bedding,
and assorted kitchen towels, and cleaning rags
= a neverending process
which starts with a rousing chorus of
"Bring your laundry to the washroom or you can do it yourself."
Come on, moms, you probably know this one, sing it with me.

"Bring your laundry to the washroom or you'll wash it yourself,
Get it out here now, don't bother waiting for the laundry elf.
I load the washer and dryer, and I fold it all by hand,
For you to bring it out here is all that I demand.
Bring your laundry to the washroom it's part of the routine,
Bring your laundry to the washroom so I can get it clean."

I know ergonomics goes into planning a great many things but the washer and dryer industry clearly has paid that little fad no mind at all.
No worries, herniated discs injured while trying to manage a controlled fall into a washer retrieving that last sock from the bottom of the washer tub are totally covered by your domestic laborer policy.

And can we talk about unbalanced loads for a moment?
Why, why for the love of all that is holy can the dang thing not just shut itself off till I can get in there to fix it? Why does it have to try and walk all over the laundry room like a possessed appliance from a B movie?

Anyway, so once one manages to get the laundry out of the dark recesses of the smelly caves of one's trogdolytes. Thrown it all into the heaving, spewing beast known as a wash, then retrieved it from its gaping maw to transfer it to a dryer or, if you love standing with your arms over your head for extended periods of time, a clothesline, you can then start the truly rewarding task of folding laundry.
Golly, is there a greater privilege known to humanity?

This is so much fun, let's get back to the math;

Approx. 200 items of laundry a week (conservatively) =
10,400 a year
(my kids are 13 and 10, that means this continues at roughly the same rate for a minimum 5 years)
so 10,400 x 5 =


Oy vey


furiousBall said...

i don't even want to do my laundry math, in fact if i stop, it will overcome me

Nessa said...

No wonder I hate laundry so much -especially folding.

I am truly depressed now.

S said...

Aw, quit your moaning and go to the laundromat for once.
You will come home with a new appreciation for your own gaping maw.

Fred said...

How totally depressing. What makes it worse in this house is the fact the D2 can sometimes go through four outfits a day. She's been known to go put on several bathing suits when we're hanging out by the pool.

Breazy said...

add one more person and one more bed plus an extra change of clothes for one of the people and then double the towels for two of them then figure it all up, that is my laundry sum. I am singing with you!

lime said...

oh honey, you don't have girls who can change outfits many times a day. or kids in uniforms who wear a uniform to school then come home and put on playclothes. you do have baseball players though right? seriously, who invented white baseball pants. certainly not a mother.

Seamus said...

...and then you could have a dog that likes to drag the just washed laundry across the floor doubling the work!

We put our front loaders up on pedestals and it certainly is easier on the back!