which I have chosen and therefore accept, is to procure some decent left handed scissors.
Susie scored me a 40% off coupon and now I shall finally have my precious, precious lefty cutters again, no more paper folding over and kinking up between the blades, no more craning my head every which way to make sure I'm actually cutting where I want to be.
Now my breath will be mintier, my lipstick won't smudge off on glasses and maybe my eyelashes will quit bumping into my sunglasses.
I am the eternal optimist.
Oh damn it, I'm running late, my life is ruined.