Monday, April 10, 2006

Have you met this guy?


We went to the library Friday afternoon, arrived at 5:05. The parking lot was deserted, the lights were off.
Thing One and I were disappointed at these obvious signs that the library was already closed. We could return the books that were due but our fresh stack of reading material was going to have to wait. I went to deposit our books in the afterhour drop when a man came screeching to a halt in the handicap parking spot and sprinted past me, running for the door. He tried the door, which was locked. I started putting books in the drop slot. He cupped his hands to glass, verified the building was empty, read the library hours placard aloud, cussed, then tried the doors AGAIN. Harder. Repeatedly.
Hello, dimwit! What are you gonna do, break into the public library?? What is that about?
I wish this was an isolated incident, but of course it is not. I am sure you have met this man or one of the interchangeable and ubiquitous members of his secret society of annoying stupid people.
Perhaps, if you are very brave, you will admit to having once engaged in their obscene rituals (for scientific or research purposes only, I am sure).
Have a story?
Come on, share it with us!
Mondays always feel better once you've made sport for your neighbor, and laughed at them in your turn.

16 comments:

lime said...

hhmm, it is early monday morning the brain juices are nto flowing but i have this...
limelette #1 loves 'queen.' she was rocking out to 'bohemian rhapsody' when she announced. 'man freddie mercury is a genius! i would so marry him.' i arched a single eyebrow at her , she blushed and added, 'um, well, if he weren't dead...and if he liked girls.'

k, just so long as we have that straight.

S said...

LOL @ Lime's story, I can't, it's Monday... :P

The Grunt said...

Good one. I seem to always have people come in an elevator ask me where it's going "3rd floor", then they say "Oh, that's where were going", then they push the already lit up 3rd floor button like ten times. I want to hit them over the head with a stale bagette.

Stephanie said...

Ok - I was just at the doctors for the twins check-up. There is a medical supply store/pharmacy on the bottom floor. I figured while I'm there I should stop in and get V a new brace. I went over to the wall with all the different braces, wraps etc. - there are no figure 8 braces. So I go to the desk and ask the girl if there are any somewhere else because there are none on the wall. She proceeds to walk over to the wall, looks around,comes back and tells me there are no figure 8 braces on the wall. Did she think I was lying?

babyjewels said...

You don't have to protect him. that was Egan, wasn't it?

DaMasta said...

Today after work, someone from the outside came up to the front doors [after I had already locked them] and asked, "are ya'll closed?"

WTF does it look like, arsehole??

No, we're not closed, I just like to lock the doors, shut off the tv screens, grab my purse and leave BEFORE I start work. Duh.

Anonymous said...

Lime~ you said straight, heh heh, that definitely does not describe Freddy!

Susie~ I expect you to report in later with a story mocking someone, I feel sure you can do it.

Grunt~ Doncha hate that?? grrrrrr

Snavy~ Did you let her have it, or just give her a look?

Lelu~ Some of my favorite people are guys, easy there.

Babyjewels~ Ok, are you psychic or what, it totally was, you are good!!

Damasta~ ooooh, good one, that is annoying!

Kat said...

I have tried doors of places that weren't opened a cuple of times, BUT in my defense, once it wasn't obvious it was closed, and once I realized it I left. The other time, they weren't open yet I could see workers inside, so I checked the sign, I was half an hour too early. :)

Breazy said...

LMAO @ the other stories !

The Grunt said...

I just noticed I was added to the blogs 'n' stuff list. Thankyuveramuch!

S said...

OK well there IS the WALK button that you have to push even though 2 other people already have just in case they didn't do it right.

Push it 10 or12 times rapidly.

egan said...

What happens if you cross Captain Obvious with Captain Caveman and Captain Howdy Girl?

Logophile said...

Egan~ I don't think that kind of stupid could exist in earth's atmosphere, we would vaporize.

Mark Leslie said...

The poor guy - you know what, if he'd just looked at the closed sign again and then tried again, really hard, put a lot of effort into it, he would have been able to open the doors and the library would have been open.

Too bad he gave up! :(

Anonymous said...

Kat~ I can let that slide then.

breazy~ Some funny stuff here, eh?

Grunt~ Yeah, shore, ya betcha!

Bare~ Good one! And EVERYONE will do it, those poor buttons get mauled!

Mark~ See, that is what he gets for being a quitter

shezzy's sanitarium said...

ummm....it took Mr Shez several years to realise the significance of 'Bill Hayley and the COMETS'...oy vey!!