Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Half Nekkid Thursday!

Today we present..
The day the AF conducted physics experiments and found out Newton was right.
Logo went across the street
She didn't look both ways
Logo forgot what happened then
It's all kind of a haze.
A car hit Logo quickly
Logo began to fly
But her head went through the windshield
She never reached the sky.
Logo skid across the pavement
Then laid there in a heap
traffic was blocked for miles
Blood began to seep.
The aid car took her into town
A clinic took her in
They said she was all busted up
in need of rods and pins.
Her scapula was broken
So was her collarbone
Her leg looked like a phone pole
And her head needed sewn.
They did a CAT scan of her brain
because she was so dizzy
She couldn't sit up on her own
She kept the nurses busy.
Weeks later she got to go back home
It was a year till she could walk
That was over ten years ago now
She can ski and even climb rocks.
But let this be a lesson to all
It can be dangerous to use your feet
Don't be brave, take this advice
Take a bus to cross the street!
Now to the pictures, the first is two of the lovely titanium screws and rod that were inserted and later removed from the lower left leg of the Alpha Female. For those who love gory details, they pop the kneecap off to do this.
Next is the leg which had the rod in it for about four years, requiring three surgeries, fun fun fun!

Note the lovely scar on the knee? and there are small frankenstein-ish scars on the inner ankle too.

Last we have the misshapen collarbone curtesy of the roof of the car. The shoulderblade was a more impressive break, but no visible signs, so we have to make do this. There ya have it! This is why we are big fans of crosswalks. Happy HNT!

Don't know about the Half Nekkid Thursday craze? Click the button on the side bar>>

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Just last year

Right about this time last year the Alpha Female went shopping in downtown Seattle with a friend she met on-line. It was her first time meeting in person anyone with whom she had chatted on yahoo.
It was a fun, wonderful day and April was even more fabulous in person than she had been on-line. The shopping included Sephora and the Pike Place Market and of course Westlake Center, as seen here.
Outside Westlake is a coffee place that shall remain nameless in deference to the more sensitive among us. While sitting and warming various extremities Logo and April got to watch the police take down and remove a clearly dangerous person. Despite the complete lack of a struggle this character required no less than 6 officers to supervise his peaceful surrender to the authorities.

And then we have the touching moment when Avvy and Logo realized they were kindred spirits, they both thought this next photo was hysterically funny. This is April posing with that most beloved of all northwest seafood, the geoduck (goo-ee-duck).

Next we have logo posing outside a Seattle landmark of some note, although they did not go in or particularly have, as the sign urged, an erotic day. It was a good day though!

Monday, November 28, 2005

Trivia Tuesday!

Are ya ready to show us how clever you are?
Click THE QUIZ and we shall see.
Don't google!
Thanks to those who donated Qs,
You shall be blessed, and do better at the quiz.
Don't like your score?
Donate a Q for the next quiz!

Send your question with four possible answers,
and *the correct one marked* to

MEMEMEME~glorious me!

From my list of 101 things about ME!

1. I am black.
Portuguese Water Dogs do come in other shades. But I am your basic, gorgeous, raven headed beauty.
Here are some of my distant cousins sporting the other colors.

2. I am frequently discriminated against because of my race, or species, or something.

My people NEVER take me to the library or store, well, they do, but they leave me in the car. The only stores they ever take me in are pets stores. I like that, they have those classy "choose your own entree" areas like at fancy seafood places. Last time we were there I picked out an especially tasty looking hampster, but they wouldn't buy it for me. Anyway, I know they love me and all, but sometimes a gal can't help but feel she is getting second class citizen treatment.

I could go on, but you get my drift.
Want to know more about making Monday all about you?
Go see Robin

Sunday, November 27, 2005


In the middle of a difficulty lies opportunity.
~Albert Einstein

I would like to tell you the story of this boat. It was purchased by the AM about four years ago. After nearly ten years of persuasion he finally convinced his friend to sell him this boat. This friend is horribly plagued by seasickness and a virilent and pernicious form of packratiness (the inability to part with vehicles of any description, even those that make him violently ill).
He finally agreed to sell it to the Alpha Male just as the family was moving to Italy and so it was agreed the boat would remain lying in state on the back of his friend's property. After all, having spent the last 20 years exposed to the weather was another 3 or 4 going to make any difference?
And yet...we are now approaching the five year mark.
The AM named this cubic zirconia in the rough "Persistence" because of the long years he waited for his friend to agree to sell it to him. Now he waits for the trailer to move it and the time to work on it.
The Alpha Female has an idea for a new name, Obstinance.

Saturday, November 26, 2005

Life is just so frustrating sometimes!

Here we have one of the MOST annoying things in my life,
See these shiftless malingerers?
The AF will not let me out to get them,
she will not even allow me to bark or even growl at them.
Clearly yard security is not her area of expertise, yet does she let me handle it?
NO!!Next we have a pic of the Alpha Male bogartin' the 'puter.
How am I sposta blog when he is in my spot??

Le sigh

Friday, November 25, 2005

SPF post below

It is Friday, please send any quiz questions along with 4 possible answers and the correct one *marked* to for Tuesday Trivia.
My thanks to Barefoot, Idiot of the West, Lime, BS, Mr. Ratburn, Weirsdo, and Jon for donating Qs for the last quiz.

SPF~Rubba Dub Dub - Thanks for the Grub....Yay God.

Something/s/one that makes Thanksgiving.
Your Dinner
The Aftermath
Bonus Points: tacky centerpiece
Well, family is what makes Thanksgiving what it is.
Here are the elves in the kitchen.
Here are the other photo bugs trying to make sure this photographer didn't escape unpictured.
This is Diego, the newest member of the family.
These are the young pups with the patriarch, holy heck there are alot of them!
Food for 40 people takes up alot of room, but here is one view of it.
And this is what was left.
Now we didn't have a table that would fit all of us, so there was no centerpiece.
we got a gorgeous rainbow, so here.
It was better in person, but you get the idea.
Wanna know more about Stuff Portrait Friday?
Go ask Kristine, to whom we are all thankful.

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Happy Thanksgiving!

One reason I am thankful:
My people don't do this to me,

Thank heaven for small mercies.
And now a couple jokes.
First, a clean one.

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked the stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
The stock boy answered, "No ma'am, they're dead."
Now a mildly suggestive one,
Did you hear about the X-rated turkey? It's served with very little dressing.
And now the ones that sound really dirty, but are really just passing comments on Thanksgiving.

10. "Talk about a huge breast!"
9. "It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?"
8. "Don't play with your meat."
7. "Just spread the legs open & stuff it in."
6. "I didn't expect everyone to come at once!"
5. "You still have a little bit on your chin."
4. "How long will it take after you stick it in?"
3. "You'll know it's ready when it pops up."
2. "That's the biggest one I've ever seen!"
1. "How long do I beat it before it's ready?"

Happy Turkey Day, turkeys!
And to my non-US blogging friends, have a great Thursday!
Hope your day is full of laughter, fun, great food, family, friends and joy.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

OOOOOOOOOh woe is me!!

I bear sad tidings, hold me.
Sam is dead.

He was featured here a couple weeks ago. So heartbreaking when the young and beautiful die, and while he was neither of those two things, it is still a sad moment for those with ANY soul AT ALL!!

Happy HUMP Day!!

It is that time of week again, when we get to discuss humping in a semi-legit manner.
Doncha just love it?
So today I have another question for you all.
I know when we start discussing the word
we all get a mental image.

What do you find most important about the object of your potential attention?
This character here for example has very poor grooming and his knees, lord have mercy, pumice!
Posture is also important. He also probably has a tendency to spit, very unattractive.
How about you?
P.S. Happy Turkey Day to those of you who only check in at work or will be away, have fun!

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Trivia time again, it's TUESDAY!

Come on, show us what you know!
This week the questons are from the bloggers, for the bloggers, by the bloggers, so if you still don't like your score, contribute more questions next week!

As always, don't google!

For next week's quiz,
Send me your questions with four possible answers and the correct one marked to

Monday, November 21, 2005

a meme from Breazy

tagged by Breazy, thanks sweets!
Rules are as follows :
Remove the blog at #1 from the following list and bump everyone up one place;
then add your blog to the #5 spot.
1. Here's Your Sign
2. MamaKBear's World
3. Kaliblue
4. Breazy
5 Ariella
Next select 5 friends to piss off :
1. Santa Claus
2. The Easter Bunny
3. The Great Pumpkin
4. Snoopy
5. Garfield
What were you doing 10 years ago?
Sorry haven't been around that long. Ask me again in 8 1/2 years.
What were you doing 1 year ago ?
I was the cutest 7 month old PWD around. They were scheming to take me in to be "fixed" you sickos, calling it something like that.
5 snacks you enjoy :
1. lamb lung
2. turkey neck
3. chicken wings
4. beef bones with plenty of marrow....mmmm
5.and things you people REALLY don't want me to discuss
5 songs to which you know all the lyrics :
1. Oh Holy Night
2. Silent Night
3. Hark, The Herald Angels Sing
4. Joy To The World
5. Oh Little Town Of Bethlehem
(The AF joined the Christmas choir again, oh yay)
5 things you would do if you were a millionaire :
1. buy a house
2 buy furniture for the house
3. buy a K car
4. build a tree fort in the yard
5. buy a minifridge for tree fort
5 bad habits :
1. licking personal areas in public
2. running next door without permission
3. jumping unexpectedly on the groin region of the AM
4 Removing food from the custody of those who do not properly keep track of it, they tell me this is a bad habit, I think it is the right thing to do.
5. Waking family members abruptly, by jumping on them or thrusting cold nose in their face or ear
5 things you like doing :
2. eating
3. playing
4. blogging
5. swimming
5 things you would never wear again :
1. that stupid huge white collar, cruelty to animal mean anything to you people??
2. the hat Thing One made for me, do I look like I want to be sailor, I don't THINK so
3. The T-shirt the Things decorated and handed down to me, those children kepp their arms in the wrong place
4. a flea collar, it gave me such an itch!
5. a belt, the halloween swashbucklers can go get themselves a real pirate pet, this Porty has important engagements elsewhere, gonna wash my hair or something.
5 favorite toys :
1. my teddy bear
2. my rope toy
3. Star Wars figurines
4. my squeaky octopus
5. my tennis balls

And it wouldn't really be complete if I didn't slip it in somewhere...
Damn you Bob Barker!

Meme Monday

Wow, it is time to talk about me some more, you all know how I hate that.
My 101 things about me list includes the following.

23. I am ever so slightly clumsy.
24. I trip on stairs occasionally
25. I trip on nothing at all sometimes
26. I have been known to bump into stationary objects.
27. With my head
But I would like to point out that just means I fit right in around here. I am not the only one. The AM frequently bumps his head on cupboard doors which he somehow thinks is the fault of the AF. The Things only just barely manage to stay upright half the time. And THEN, the AF, iii yiii yiii...

Want to make sure everyone knows Monday is all about you?
Go see Robin.
Meme Monday is her stroke of genius.

In other news, I know a couple of my visitors are rock climbing enthusiasts. Here we see the Alpha Female doing the part of rock climbing she is least uncomfortable engaging in...mocking the climbers.

Below are two pictures of the Alpha Male doing his testosterone thang. Adrenalin is everything, didn't you get that memo? He also cooks and does dishes. Just don't ask him to sing.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

This and that and some of that other stuff over there.

Here is a picture of Thing One and Thing Two playing Monopoly Jr. with their grandmama. The parental units of the AF came for the weekend. The Aged Ps, as she refers to them, are wonderful houseguests; they entertain the children, they do the dishes, they cook, they clean. They really ought to come more often.

In the next picture, in the background, you see the Aged P (XY version) and the Alpha Male in the kitchen. The AM made an absolutely fabulous lemon meringue pie but that is not my main point. See the sign above my head?

This is displayed for it's supposed entertainment and nostalgia value. It reads, "No thieves, fakirs, rogues or tinkers, no skulking loafers or flea-bitten tramps. No slap and tickle of the wenches, no banging of tankards of the tables, no dogs in the kitchen, no cockfighting."
Now, we don't have alot of roving tinkers, fakirs, fighting cocks, or flea-bitten tramps, so there is no relevance there, BUT
I have seen some slapping and tickling, those darn kids would bang ANYTHING on EVERYTHING, so why, why, why do they insist I should stay out of the kitchen??
And now for something completely different.
Some of you may recall this photo...This is the sort of heinous filth the AM insists on purchasing and consuming from time to time. Emeril and Alton Brown would not approve, I am sure of it. Below you see the sort of thing the AF feeds the Things.
No sugar, no white flour... why would you do that to children? And last but not least, a joke about another clever dog, passed on to me by BS.

Talking Dog for Sale

A guy sees a sign in front of a house "Talking Dog for Sale."
He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the back yard.
The guy goes into the back yard and sees a mutt sitting there.
"You talk?" he asks.
"Yep," the mutt replies.
"So, what's your story?"
The mutt looks up and says "Well, I discovered this gift pretty young and I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift, and in no time they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leader, cause no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.I was one of their most valuable spies eight years running. The jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger and I wanted to settle down. So I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security work, mostly wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings there and was awarded a batch of medals. Had a wife, a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
The owner says "Ten dollars."
The guy says he'll buy him but asks the owner,
"This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him?"
The owner replies, "Because he's such a complete liar."

Saturday, November 19, 2005

Is this thing on?


More reasons to love me

OK, for any of you who are completely oblivious, or very new to my blog - you should know I think I have a really awesome family. And that is a completely objective opinion, of course.
Here is Thing Two serenading me with How Much Is That Doggy In the Window.
(Hope they get him lessons soon, his enthusuiasm and lung capacity are awesome.)
Here I am with Thing One checking his lunch for freshness and, hopefully, flavor.
Despite my pointed stares and blatant hints I received for my efforts exactly one (1) apple slice.

And here are the snotgobblers posing in their hats from a friend in South Africa. They enjoyed the Rand, the hats, and the tea, but frankly, the candy was the highlight as far as they were concerned.

The sugar comas set in about 5 minutes after this pic, you can see the impending crash.

Friday, November 18, 2005

Am I not cute and precious?

Alright,don't forget this is your last day. Please send any trivia question you are donating to the tuesday quiz, along with four answers and the correct one marked, to My thanks to those who have assisted so far.
Here I am with Thing Two, this is a size comparison pic for a friend. As you can see Thing Two is almost twice my height but I can still win against him at tug o' war. He is very good about sharing, but not so good at the sneaking of food to me. We are working on it.

SPF~The past, the present, and the future.

I again detect an anti-canine bias, but I will be the bigger species here.
My past, my present, and my future consist of eating, playing, sleeping and taking potty breaks.
So fine, here again, bogartin' the screen time, the AF in the past.
A lil tune to strike the mood, sing along if you know it...
She's so mean but I don't care
I love her eyes and her wild wild hair
dance to the beat that we love best
heading for the nineties
living in the wild wild west
the wild wild west.

The Present
Oh my life is changing every day in every possible way
Though my dreams, it’s never quite as it seems
I know I've felt like this before but now I’m feeling it even more because it came from you
Then I open up and see the person fumbling here is me, a different way to be.
I want more, impossible to ignore impossible to ignore
they’ll come true, impossible not to do, impossible not to do.
Now I tell you openly, you have my heart so don’t hurt me for what I couldn’t find.
Talk to me, amazing mind so understanding and so kind, you’re everything to me
Oh my life is changing every day in every possible way
Though my dreams, it’s never quite as it seems’cause you’re a dream to me.

(Here in the place we dream is a collection of things that overwelmingly occupy the present; books on history, teaching, reading, math, learning styles, want ads, family budget planning and an atlas-showing all the places we may end up with the soon approaching job change.)

The Future

Times when the day is like a play by Sartre

When it seems a book burning's in perfect

gave the doctor my description

Ive tried to stick my prescriptions

Someday Ill have a disappearing hairline

Someday Ill wear pyjamas in the daytime

Afternoons will be measured out, measured with

Coffeespoons and T.S. Eliot

It's all about the stuff, didja know?


Well, go see Kristine, she'll clear it up for ya.

Thursday, November 17, 2005


The Alpha Male is the only one in the family with a tattoo, and those seem to be pretty popular, so here I am with him this week showing off the ink. It is a tiger which the AF refers to as his orange pig when she is being pissy.
It looks nothing like a pig, she just amuses herself in cruel and unusual ways...
insultin' a man's tat, sheesh, is nothing sacred??

Wanna get halk nekkid with us? Click the lil icon on the sidebar>>>

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Happy HUMP Day!

Hope your week is going well. Send those trivia questions with the answers to the e-mail below. Composition occurs on the weekend, so sending them before Friday would be faboo. OK, for today, I love picnics!
Here we see Thing One and Thing Two having a picnic in the yard. They are true Washingtonians despite their years abroad. Please note the supporting evidence~sandals and jackets.
Now a little triva...
The mid-day of the week is named for the Norse God, Odin. He was also known as Woden or Wotan. Unlike many of the other days of the week, this day did not correspond roughly with the Roman designation for the day. (The Roman's named Wednesday for the messenger God - Mercury - In Romanian, the day is still known as miercuri). The early Scandanavians and Germans believed that Odin was the chief God of Asgard and as such deserved to have a day of the week named for him. The Anglo-Saxons used the word, Wodnesdaeg.
Wednesday is often reffered to as "hump day" because of its position as the middle day of the work week. If the work week were a hill. Then Wednesday would be the crest. It is all down hill from there. (Whether the down hill ride is a coast or a descent into a swamp is left to the individual.)
Only one holiday typically recurs yearly upon Wednesday. Ash Wednesday is the official begining of lent. It is called "Ash" Wednesday because since the 400's it has been the day upon which religious penitent's foreheads are marked with ash. It is a reminder of the mortal condition of the flesh - that we are all dust. This day is a variable date dependent on the date which easter falls.

OK, and just for Damasta...who would you hump for a Klondike Bar?

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Trivia Tuesday

OK, are you ready? It's time to do it again!
Show us just how much of your available brain space is full of useless information, we want to know, really we do.
The rules, (Idiot of the east, pay attention!!)
NO googling, etc. OK, here it is...
Trivia quiz for Tuesday.

Or, if you don't like that one,

UPDATE to the edit~
I have been informed that we are too obscure.
I am therefore accepting questions for next week's quiz.
Send your question and four possible answers
(with the correct one marked)

Join the fun and make sure you know at least one more answer!

Monday, November 14, 2005


A future bright
A home established
Expectations high
And promises made
Then we burned our boats on the shore

The cold reality
The often clouded sky
Rarely stars to guide
Little light ever shed
And our burnt out boats on the shore

The only warmth from sharing
The best protection~ each other's arms
Despite doubts
Our hearts knit together
And we burned our boats long ago

Mememe, glorious me!

From my 101 things about ME list.

82. I have a whole basket full of toys
83. I would still rather steal toys from the kids
84. I think Star Wars figures are especially tasty

I have an ongoing game with Thing One and Thing Two. They try to make me only play with my own toys, and I sneak into their rooms and take theirs. I am convinced they enjoy it despite their protests, that is just for form's sake, I am sure of it

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Buona Domenica!

This is the second part of a two-part series titled "Recreational Winter Sports You Can Do Sitting Down."
Last week, in part one, I discussed snowmobiling, with my key finding being that you should not go snowmobiling with adolescent boys unless your recreational goal is total cardiac arrest.
Today, I'll discuss a sport that is more relaxing, as well as more fragrant: dog-sled-riding. A dog sled is - follow me carefully here - a sled pulled by dogs. And if you think dogs are not strong enough to pull a sled, then you have never been walking a dog when a squirrel ran past. Even a small dog in this situation will generate one of the most powerful forces known to modern science. In some squirrel-infested areas, it is not at all unusual to see a frantically barking dog racing down the street, wearing a leash attached to a bouncing, detached arm. Historians believe the dog sled was invented thousands of years ago when an Alaskan Eskimo attached a pair of crude runners to a frame, hitched this contrivance to a pack of dogs, climbed aboard, and wound up in Brazil. Today, dog sleds are mainly used in races, the most famous being the Alaskan Iditarod, in which competitors race from Anchorage to Nome, with the winner getting a cash prize of $50,000, which just about covers the winner's Chapstick expenses. I took a far more modest dog-sled ride, up and down a smallish mountain near Hailey, Idaho, on a sled operated by Sun Valley Sled Dog Adventures. This is a small company started by a very nice young guy named Brian Camilli, who plans to win the Iditarod some day, and who bought his first sled dogs five years ago with what was going to be his college tuition ("My parents still aren't sure how they feel about it," he says). I was part of a two-sled party, which requires 18 dogs. A highlight of this experience - in fact, a highlight of my entire life - was watching Brian and his partner, Jeremy Gebauer, bring the dogs, one at a time, out of the truck. Because, of course, every single dog, immediately upon emerging, had to make weewee, and then naturally had to sniff every other dog's weewee, which would cause the following thought to register in their primitive dog brains: "Hey! This is WEEWEE!" And so naturally this would cause every one of them to have to make MORE weewee, which every other one would, of course, have to sniff, the result being that we soon were witnessing what nuclear physicists call a Runaway Chain Weewee Reaction. These dogs were RARIN' to go. We passengers climbed into the sleds, and Brian and Jeremy stood on the runners behind. The sleds were tied firmly to the front bumper of the truck, but the dogs were pulling so hard that I swear I felt the truck move; I had this vision of us disappearing over the top of the mountain - dogs, followed by sleds, followed by truck, all headed for the Arctic Circle, never to be heard from again. Quickly, Brian and Jeremy untied the sleds and WHOOOAAA we were off, whipping up the trail at a very brisk pace, the dogs insanely happy. These guys know their dogs; they watch them carefully and talk to them individually. Every dog runs a little differently, has a different personality. For example, on my sled's team, Sprocket was a good, hard worker, a steady puller with a real nice gait; Brian hardly had to tell him anything. But he had to keep talking to Suzy, who was definitely not pulling her share of the load. She was waddling more than trotting. You could just tell that if Suzy worked for a large corporation, she'd spend most of her days making personal phone calls. We trotted briskly to the top of the mountain, then Jeremy and Brian turned the sleds around in a maneuver that had all the smooth precision of a prison riot as the two teams of dogs suddenly decided this would be a good time for all 18 of them to sniff each other's private regions. But they got straightened out, and we roared back down the hill. The sun was shining, the valley was spread out below us, the wind (not to mention the occasional whiff of dog poo) was whipping past our faces. It was a wonderful moment, and I felt as though I never wanted to get off the sled, even if there had been some way to stop it. I'll write when we reach Brazil.
By Dave Barry

Saturday, November 12, 2005

Yay, it's the weekend!

a chance to relax
and recover from
an exhausting week
of napping, lounging,
lolling, sprawling, dozing,
reposing and drowsing.

Friday, November 11, 2005

A meme from Snav

I opened my book and I thrust out my finger.
I opened my eyes and my heart fill with anger.
My digit had landed on the word involute
A use for which baffles~ but I am resolute.
Being the responsive blogging friend that I am
I will post this for snavy, who tagged me, but damn,
Why not 'enthusiasm' or something like 'sport'
to showcase my verbal ability to contort.
And so end my riff on this meme of mine
I hereby tag Icy, the idiot and Lime.
1. flip open a dictionary and point to a word
2. type the word into google images.
3. pick an image that strikes you.
4. write a 10 line riff off the image.
5. use the word or the meaning of the word at least once within the first 5 lines of your riff.
6. tag 3 other bloggers on your list.
Brought to you courtesy of Lacram


This is what happens when canines blog, I accidently had comment moderation on, and then turned it off and lost all the comments. If you commented I did NOT delete it, I am just technology challenged sometimes.

SPF~ show me the money!

The last thing you bought for yourself
The last thing someone bought for you
Your wallet

I, being of the canine persuasion, don't have much to offer you in these catagories. The last thing someone bought me was dog food, I don't shop for myself and I don't carry a wallet. So once again we will offer you the belongings of the AF for your perusal.
The last thing logo bought for herself .

This is a loose leaf tea blend called Dreamzicle and an all natural body shampoo and spray scented with black tea and honey. She has a lil tea fixation, as some of you know.
Here are CDs purchased and recorded by a wonderful friend.

Now we reach the portion of the assignment that reveals an odd quirk.
Despite being nearly incapable of dressing herself without advice, the AF has acquired an unseemly number of wallets and purses in the eternal quest for the "perfect" one.
Recently she sent 10 of them to the thrift shop, these are the ones she claimed she couldn't live without.
This is the one that is closest to the current standard of perfection.

One of the reasons she likes it so much is that it transitions easily to all of these bags in addition to the several black bags she insists she needs. It is just large enough to hold all the things she needs to carry is small enough to fit in her back pocket, which oddly enough, regardless of the enormous collection of purses, is the way she usually ends up carrying it!

Wanna know more about Stuff Portrait Friday?
check it out!

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Happy HNT!


It is that time of week again, can you believe it?
Well, I know you people come to see the Alpha Female
So, being the accomodating type that I am, here we are together again.
And BTW, this is one of the reason the AF is also known as the logophile.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Happy HUMP Day!!

It is halfway through the week and here is a lil humor to ease you over the hump.
10 reasons it is great to be a dog.
1. No one expects you to take a bath every day.
2. Your friends never expect you to pay for anything.
3. If it itches, you can reach it.
4. No matter what itches, no one is offended if you scratch it
5. You can wear a fur coat and no one thinks you're insensitive.
6. No one gets mad if you fall asleep while they're talking.
7. As an adult, it's OK if you haven't "amounted to anything"
8. You don't have to worry about good table manners.
9. Someone else combs your hair.
10. If you gain weight, it's someone else's fault.

And a couple more, just because you are still here.

What's the difference between a new spouse and a new dog?
After a couple years the dog is still excited to see you.

What do you call a brilliant blonde?
A golden retriever.
(That's for you big boy, you know how I love a clever dog)


How do you know when you're really ugly?
Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed.

OK, it wasn't worth the wait, sorry, but it went with the theme.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Trivia Tuesday

Here is the deal, I have another quiz for you.
BUT, no googling answers, let's see how much useless crap you store in your head.

How Trivial can you get?

Monday, November 07, 2005

Mememe! Cuz it's all about ME!

6. I have some cat-like tendencies.
7. I like to perch in the window sill.
8. I will chase rope toys if they are dragged along the ground in front of me.
9. I like to weave between people's legs.
I blame these things on my maternal gramma. Her name is Kitty.
My people often call me puppycat.
Hey, we all have our issues!

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Ever Seen A Bald Dog ?

By Dave Barry

Our topic today, on Breakthroughs in Medicine, is: New Hope From Dog Spit.
I have here some very exciting scientific correspondence from William B. Yancey, M.D., who is a medical doctor and therefore legally allowed to:
1) park anywhere;
2) give shots;
3) tell people to get naked and
4) make scientific observations
Dr. Yancey wrote to me about an observation that he scientifically made regarding his Labrador retriever, who is named Refrigerator. Refrigerator recently underwent hip surgery; in preparation for the operation, the veterinarian shaved his hindquarters. Then, realizing his mistake, he also shaved Refrigerator's hindquarters.
No, seriously, the veterinarian's hindquarters have nothing to do with this, and I am instructing the jury to disregard them. The point is that Refrigerator had all the fur removed from his rear end (or, in medical parlance, his "bazooty").
If you know anything about dogs, you know how Refrigerator spent his recuperation period: He licked himself pretty much full time. Dogs are very big believers in the healing power of licking.
If dogs operated a hospital, here's how it would work: A patient would arrive in the Emergency Room, and a team of doctor dogs would gather around to conduct an examination, which would consist of thoroughly sniffing the patient. (They would also sniff the floor, in case anybody had left food lying around.)
Then the doctor dogs would hold a conference, and whatever the patient's symptoms were -- coughing, lack of pulse, a spear passing all the way through the patient's head -- the doctor dogs would agree that the best course of treatment was: licking.
And we're talking about a LOT of licking. Not just the patient licking himself or herself; but also the doctors licking the patient, licking themselves, and licking the other doctors. This is state-of-the-art medical care for dogs.
Their equivalent of a CAT scan machine would be a big tube filled with tongues.
So anyway, after his operation, Refrigerator was performing medical care on himself, and Dr. Yancey made a scientific observation; namely, that Refrigerator's hair "has grown fastest in the areas where he has spent significant time licking himself."
Using this observation, Dr. Yancey was able to form a scientific hypothesis -- a term that is formed from two Greek words, "hy", which means "something", and "pothesis" which means "that pops into your head while you are watching a dog lick itself after you have maybe had a couple of brewskis."
Dr. Yancey's hypothesis is this: Dog spit grows hair. In fact, Dr. Yancey believes that unwanted hair, such as facial hair on women and nose hair on men, probably did not exist until the human race domesticated dogs and started getting licked all the time.
But the more important implication is that dog spit could be a revolutionary new hair-growth treatment for balding men. Granted, we do not yet have actual laboratory proof of this. But we do have a published report in the form of this column, which has been printed in a newspaper with professional-looking margins.
So I think it's time to move past the research phase of Dr. Yancey's hypothesis and go directly to the phase where we unleash the power of this amazing discovery to benefit humanity, to make the world a better place, and -- most important -- to make money.
Specifically what I am thinking of is a franchised line of hair-growth salons, perhaps with a sophisticated name such as La Spitte Du Chien Pour Les Hommes. Upon arriving at a salon, a client would undergo a pre-treatment interview, during which he would be asked a series of scientific questions ("Do you have money? How much?").
The client would then be ushered into the Preparation Area, where his scalp would be coated with a scientifically designed, nutrition-enhanced, precision-balanced formulation consisting of Skippy brand peanut butter.
Finally the client would enter the Treatment Area, where he would be instructed to lie down on the floor with his arms at his sides. A door would then be opened, and a professional Hair Growth Technician, barking loudly, would sprint into the room at upwards of 400 miles per hour, skid to a stop, and begin enthusiastically treating the client's scalp.
All of the technicians at La Spitte Du Chien Pour Les Hommes would be carefully selected on the basis of friendliness, professionalism, and not peeing on the clients.
I grant you that this procedure has a few wrinkles that need to be worked out, such as the issue of creamy vs. chunky. But basically I think it makes at least as much scientific sense as the baldness cures you see advertised in magazines. I see no reason why we can't go ahead and start setting up franchise salons, and if any government agencies such as the Food and Drug Administration have any questions, well, they can just send their inspectors around to meet with our Board of Directors, Big Boy and Fang. They love inspectors. It's their favorite meal.

Saturday, November 05, 2005

Congrats to a friend!

This is Lexi, she is Border Collie from England. Her people moved to VA and she met a handsome American collie.
Here she is with their cute lil babies, and looking quite pleased with herself,
righfully so.