Tuesday, October 04, 2005

It is Tuesday, must be time for a rant.

OK, let me preface this statment by saying I think those people from PETA are over the top. I eat animals, and I have seen your teeth, you are suppose to be eating animals too. We omnivores have to stick together.
However, I seriously question the wellness of a species that would bring a pet into their home and then abuse or neglect it. This is a simple one, people. It is not as if you had sex and whoops...look what happened! (BTW, when that happens, put the kid up for adoption, don't mistreat it.) People actually get possession of creatures and then choose to hit them, and kick them, and starve them, and even do things worse than that. I think old Abe had it about right.

"I care not for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it." - Abraham Lincoln

Now, let us move on to the rightful place of the canine.
By Ambrose Bierce in The Devil's Dictionary, 1911.
"DOG, n. A subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the world's worship . . . . His/Her master works for the means wherewith to purchase the idle wag of the Solomonic tail, seasoned with a look of tolerant recognition."

See, this is all we ask of you, worship us. Does anyone love you as much as your dog? Do your family member become insane with joy upon your arrival home?
We encourage you to fitness (take us for a freaking walk already!)
We allow you the sensual (as in "of the senses", not sexual, ya pervs) pleasure of extended contact with an affection being (that would be when you pet us).
We help you live longer.
Face it, we are the best thing going.

7 comments:

Tom & Icy said...

So wonderful, your speech! You are our spokes-dog!

Thomcat said...

i still think the ancient egyptians were dead on when they worshipped cats ...

snavy said...

Freaking cats!! Achoooo!

weirsdo said...

Yes, thomcat. I was about to say that my cat begs to differ on a few points here.

Do you visit here, Ariella?

Doug said...

I'm with you Ariella, and with Snavylyn. Thanks, Weirsdo for bringing back a trophy.

Ariella said...

Weirdso,
Thanks for the link, great site!
Doug, thanks for stopping by, and I will be visiting you often, I can tell.

pal2k9s said...

Please continue to rant! Fantastic stuff! :)